It wasn’t until I

could feel the wind

kissing my hand,

arm hanging out of

your old rusty van

that I realized that

I have a purpose

even if that purpose is purely

letting other people know

that sometimes

a little air is all you need

to bring you back into reality

even if it’s just for a moment.

And thinking back

on the wind

brushing my skin

it makes me see

how I can be okay

sometimes.

Makes me wanna breathe to actually

stay alive

not just breathe

to live.

Makes me wanna

sleep to be awake

soon

instead of

sleeping and wanting to sleep

forever.

When I say I think about you all the time

I can prove it right here,

because even the wind

reminds me of you.

Must be why I’ve come to love the breeze,

feeling like I can hear your voice

in the wind whistling through the trees,

warms my chest filling me with

life

making me wanna live to

be alive

not just live to die

God, if only you knew

how deep I was

stuck in my own head

buzzing with things like

hopelessness and

weariness and

dread but

I heard you

like I hear the wind.

It rushes through my ears

pushing my hair back

and I think to pull my hair forward

because I hated my ears

but you changed that,

so I let it all go.

not only am i learning to let my hair flow

i’m learning to be okay

with being alone

with the silence of the air

and the emptiness of the sky.

27 minutes go by until I notice the wind

has died down

and I’m left sitting here

alone?

I thought the sensation in my hair

was the embrace of the wind

but I reach back to feel

your touch on my skin.

my skin that has grown cold

from all of this chilly air

your first word

“hi” and just like that

I am warm

once again.