it’s been a while

        since I found encouragement

        to rid myself of this

        writer malnourishment

        I guess I lost myself

        trying to explore the world

        yet I still found my mind in the gutters

        and the oil stains

        left on the street in front of my house

        my car and I share similarities

        our oil finds its way

        to permeate the days

        and leaves us unable to ignite

        due to a lack of substance

it sure has been a while

        since I felt alive

        I am so tired and strung out

        I keep on strumming and picking

        but my fingers cannot coordinate

        with a lack of rhythm

        I get lost in the music

        so often that I can’t bring myself into reality

but maybe because it’s been a while

        since I saw the good in people

        or even in myself

        I hate this lack of human inside me

        I just flip through channels and can’t choose one

        I am always changing; good and bad

        we are told to never see the dark side of things

        but the world I live in makes it so easy

it has been a while

        since I spoke on my emotions

        but I have motion sickness

        and my mind is nothing but static