Daring to yearn for freedom as

the doors of your prison open

the view of white death before you

all of your small hopes broken

standing in a door between hell’s

cold fingers brush your skin

beautiful death covers the hills

The horror, the brutality

eats away at my heart until I no longer

see the need to go on.

I bite my lip,

holding in the

rage,

the remorce

the screams

I want the world to hear.

but they won’t.

the water is still.

sitting on the dock, watching the horizon

I see

the bright orange, pink, yellow sky

with a mix of purple and blue

slowly fading away into darkness

The water spraying around me

The waves like endlessness enveloping me,

Surrounding me, smothering me

The hugeness of the ocean

Obscures my vision

Numbs my senses

Yet I feel the waves

Pounding, beating.

Regretful murder suicides

Or better yet, just suicides.

Acting as if you knew all about it,

You’re helping a lot,

Really, you’re not.

A class clown attempted murder today.

A mother’s little boy,

a child’s best friend,

a teacher’s beloved terror,

stood over the monster who raised his freckly faced son

like the animal he’d become,

clutching a knife.

Built into the foundation

Of this very earth

Is a virtue,

More mysterious,

More powerful

Than life itself.

resounding majesty

abundant light

interceding with the heavens

nymphs like beauty

bestowing radiance

overpowering reign

wondrous creation

I look at your face,

the flowers in the vase,

I never wanted to be in this place,

As I pace the floor,

Searching for the door,

I realize I miss you more,

So I kneel at the cross,

And pray for my loss,

The words that I say may confuse you

corrupt your mind

drive you crazy

but the one thing

it is for sure to do

is kill you

make you cry

try to run

but the words

will find you

I wish

had a tree house

One to sit in all day with my spouse

I would read to the leaves

Feel my hair move with the breeze

A tree supporting so much

Like a caring father that does such

The power to hold all

O, furry friend with aerial ears

Short in memory, but long in years

You hop, you stretch, you yawn, you drink

But as I can guess, you do not think

What passes through your fuzzy head?

You eat, you run, you go to bed

Though you’d never admit me to be justified

in saying “no,”

I think you know why I’m doing this.

Too often

I catch you staring at me, wanting me,

but never know how to say

what I have to say.

Fighting never ends…

Words back and forth…

What will come next?

Why do I put up with it at all?

What to do?

Why try anymore?

What is the point of things?

What should I do to fix things?

I need help…

I’m torn between two worlds

One where I’m accepted from what I’ve become

And another where I’m hated for who I’ve been.

Each day I walk the line between the worlds

Trying to keep each other apart

But I know one day I will fail

My life is trapped inside glass walls

I try hard to make them fall

But nothing can penetrate them

The only escape is around the rim

I’m stuck to the earth around me

Hoping one day to be free

I try to grow over the rim when it’s low

Sometimes I think you’re doing this on purpose,

Locking me up inside.

With no light seeping through.

My skin turning pale,

My hope being lost.

Leaving me by myself,

A world so alone.

I feel trapped in a prison,

As the wind blows a harsh breeze,

And the trees start to sway on their knees,

Within the surface of the fleeting river,

I see myself sitting in the harsh weather,

As a boy, slouched down in the freeze.

The dust and straws are driven up and down

as the sky darkens from the clouds up high.

It starts to get cooler as the first drop hits the

ground. Then it brings more drops in till it starts

pouring from the clouds above. Some of the drops

The wind is intermitting, dry and light

It rustles the trees and leaves

with silent gracefulness

The eye catches a

glance of the honey auburn leaves

The night world is listening

to every sound echoing

Immovably unquiet and forever

Is the moon’s perch in the sky.

Sitting in a blanket of mismatched stars

Is the place children go for a sweet midnight dream.

Horrific scenery fills my mind

Some from the future, some from behind

Nightmare images that fill others with Dread

The world would be better if My Kind were dead

In spite of the sacrifices of those we’re above

I wish that I could speak my mind more easily.

I wish I didn’t fall in love so easily

and that it weren’t so obvious.

Your hopeless little tragedies

Spill so hopelessly on the floor.

The ones that take over all the attention,

The ones so goddamn impossible to ignore.

The not so gentle news

Is burning away, all this trust once built

Standing stiffly in an elevator,

An automatic mouth swallowing,

The girl who so surely stepped inside,

When she was little,

Hoping for a ride.

words

like amorphous chunks of metal

they rest on a shelf in my brain

and beg to be molded

I long to hold them in the

fire of my skull

till they are soft and malleable

There is a stillness in the air

I can feel it everywhere

Heavy darkness

Airy light

Loud silence

Empty night

It seems as though with every

breath

There is a little bit of death

A soldier dies on the battlefield on a beach in Normandy just barely old enough to shave and

just off papas knee buried in the ground with theses final words

[Chorus]

Dear ma and pa im doin fine here overseas I send my love from me and John and the

Have you ever felt pain?

Pain so deep inside of you

Pain only you can feel.

Growing up I had times of physical

and mental pain,

through it however, I have gained.

“A breath, a sigh, she closes her eyes,

hearing the forest saunas around her,

yonder the sum set the sky on fire,

burning, burning,

the stars/lew higher...”